Artists Muse
by HaileyHerondale1
Summary: Clarissa Fray loves art. Art is her one passion in life, she lives and breathes art. But when there is an accident that takes her passion away, who will inspire her to breathe again? Who will become her support, the only thing to keep her from breaking? None other than the one and only, Jace Herondale.
1. Prologue

**Hi! I'm starting my 1st fanfic, let me know if it's bad, give me tons of feedback, advice, anything. Thanks to my beta 21bdunk who is my FANGIRL buddy. This first chapter isn't to interesting, is just to set the scene and such, ya know. It WILL get better, I swear, I just didn't really know how to set the scene. Well I'll shut up and let you read, enjoy!**

Prologue

I look around and see a couple walking down Central Park. I smile and look at my sketchbook and start to draw. My hand glides across the paper as the image starts to form. They are holding hands walking down the path through the middle of the park next to a fountain. The girl has ink-like black hair and is gorgeous, she is everything that ever girl wants to be without trying. The boy is almost the opposite, he is cute, but in a nerdy way. He has glasses and he almost looks like my childhood friend-

"Simon?!" I ask and his head whips towards me. The girl just looks from me to Simon and back to me with confusion lacing her expression. Simon just looks at me for a second and I will him to remember. His eyes light up with recognition just as the girls phone starts to ring. She and Simon both look down at it and the girl smiles. She answers the call and Simon looks back at me with a smile.

"Clary!?" He asks, bewildered "is it really you?"

I nod at him enthusiastically, "Simon!" I exclaim " I haven't seen you in forever! I missed you so much!" I smile brightly at my childhood friend. "You should come over! Mom and Luke would love to see you!" If they ever come home...

He looks over at the girl-his girlfriend most likely, they were holding hands- and then back at me. "Maybe tomorrow?" He asks uncertainly "sorry, Clary it's just I've been kind of busy and this is the first time in a while I've been able to go on a date with Izzy and-"

"It's ok," I tell him with a laugh " I'm not going to disappear" he looks at me with relief and smiles just as Izzy hangs up the phone. She tells Simon something and he nods and she walks towards me with a glint in her eyes.

"I'm Isabelle, Simons girlfriend. Who are you?" I open my mouth to answer and she cuts me off. "You know what? I'll just ask, is my boyfriend cheating on me with you?"

I gape at her and Simon gags and looks at her like he is choking.

"Ew Iz! No, just no!" I agree with Simon wholeheartedly, "We were best friends from when we met in kindergarten till we were 17! We just haven't seen eachother in over 3 years!" And I nod.

"Oh" Izzy says, "good, I'm not really in the mood to kick both of your asses." I laugh and Simon looks at me seriously.

"She isn't joking. Don't get on her bad side. I'm serious, the results will not be pretty." He says and I look at Izzy with caution as she glares at Simon and he looks at her with fear apparent in his eyes.

Izzy looks back at me and shoots me an award winning smile and says "Call me Izzy. We are going to be best friends." She gasps "We can go shopping!" I don't hang out with girls much of you can't tell, and I can't wait to have a girl to talk fashion and boys with." Simon looks at her when she says the last part and she shrugs. "Well we should continue on our date, have Simon text you my number and we can hang out sometimes." I nod and they walk away, Wow. I think, and then I get back to finishing my drawing.

*Line break*

Once I finish my art assignment I walk downstairs to get some food because, duh, I love food. I open the fridge and see there in hardly anything I can snack on. That means I actually have to make food. I am debating on what to make when I get a great idea...

*line break*

"Thanks Jon! These are the best pancakes ever!" I tell him. He tiredly rolls his eyes.

"Can I go back to bed? It's 2 in the morning!" He exclaims and I nod, even though he is basically already running back to his room. I roll my eyes boys I think so lazy.

** _Flashback:_

 _I creep up the stairs, careful not to wake Jon and ruin my plan. Or spill the bucket of water I have, and ruin my plan. I open Jon's bedroom door and look around. It. Is. An. Absolute. Mess! I mean I understand that he is a boy, but really! There is dirty laundry and dishes and all sorts of gross stuff scattered across the room. I creep over to his bed. And dump the bucket of water all over him and his blue bed sheets. He bolts upright and starts sputtering, wiping the water out of his eyes. He looks over at me and I grin mischeviously._

 _"Clarissa. Adele. Fray. What time is it?" He says, barely containing his rage._

 _"12:50" I reply, smiling sweetly._

 _"And what do you want?" He asks me angrily._

 _I pretend to think for a moment then I start walking away and shrug "huh, I_

 _guess I forgot..." I walk out the door and I hear him lay back onto his bed and sigh so I run in and tackle him._

 _"I want pancakes!" I sing happily and he groans._

 _"God, you are so immature" he whispers and I glare at him" if I make you pancakes will you leave me alone?"_

 _"Yep." I say. He groans and walks toward the kitchen and I happily follow him._

 _**End of flashback_

Once I finish my pancakes I go upstairs, change, and finally, full of pancakes, go to sleep.

*line break*

I wake up to a dinging sound, an alarm clock? But it's Saturday! I gab my phone realizing that it's a phone call I look at the caller id and see is an unknown number but I decide to answer it anyway, it has to be important, it's 8 in the morning. On a Saturday. Who is up at this ungodly hour!?

"Hello?" I say groggily.

"Clary?" A voice I don't recognize says.

"Yea?" I say.

"It's Izzy!" So that's who it is...

"Why are you up this early?"

"Cause you're coming to my house for a sleepover in 20 minutes." I snort, she says it like I don't have a choice.

"What if I don't want to have a sleepover." I say smartly.

"Too bad. I'll text you my address" She says.

"Okay then... I'll see you soon."

"Bye"

"Bye?"

*line break*

I knock on the door to Izzy's house and gape. Her house is huge! It's practically a mansion! I am preparing to knock when the door swings open and I come face to face with a mans chest. A mans bare chest. My eyes widen and I look up to the mans face and the first word that pops into my head is "golden" and that's cause he is. He has gold hair and eyes and skin. He looks like an angel as he grins down at me. He looks almost perfect. I study his face and see he has a chip in his incisor. Ok, not quite perfect, but pretty dang close. I look into his gold eyes and I have a strange urge to draw him.

"Well," he says, " I'm used to girls chasing me, but stalking me? This is a first." I gape at him, and suddenly he doesn't seem too much like an angel

"Bitch" I call him with a glare and he winks at me just as Izzy comes down the stairs.

"I see you've met Jace..." She says with a grin.

Later we are sitting in Izzy's room and she gets an "amazing idea" she insists that I have to follow her downstairs and she won't tell me why. We walk out of her room, which is pink and has an adjoining bathroom, just like all of the other has no available surface that is not covered by makeup products. It's crazy, how does one girl need so much makeup? We walk into the hallway which consists of a few paintings, I think a couple were actually painted by my mother. There are 6 doorways, on the left is Izzy's room and 2 guest bedrooms and Alec's and haves are on the right.

I've figured out that Alec is Izzy's biological brother and looks just like her. Izzy thinks that Alec is gay and has a secret boyfriend but she doesn't know for sure. Jace was adopted when he was ten and he is obviously attractive, but he knows it which makes him much less attractive. Izzy told me he is a player and uses girls then throws them away because he is just like that. He apparently had a rough past but that is still no excuse to act the way he does.

We walk past the stairway and I to a room that I am assuming is some sort of storage room. You can tell that Izzy is the only one who uses it, there is clothes everywhere. Everywhere, I tell you. She grabs something and ushers me back into her room. I look at her, confused and she grins.

"Put this on." She tells me, and I take what she has.

"Umm... What is this?" I ask her because it looks like a round price of fabric. How am I supposed to put it on? It somewhat resembles some sort of leg warmer.

"It's a dress, Duh!" She says, like it's supposed to be obvious. I walk into the bathroom and slip it on. It's a strapless black dress and goes about 5 inches down my thigh, nothing like I usually wear. I walk into Izzy's room, and she smiles.

"Perfect!" She says.

I don't think that-"

"Now, makeup!" She interrupts and I groan.

1 hour later

"There. Perfect!" Izzy says to me. She turns me toward the mirror and tells me to look at my reflection. I gape at the stranger staring back at me. She has wide green eyes outlined in brown eyeliner. She has bright red lips and beautiful skin.

"Wow. Izzy, you can work magic with that stuff. I've never looked this pretty." I tell her.

"Not pretty, your gorgeous!" Heat rushes into my cheeks but the makeup covers my blush. She even managed to tame my fiery hair! It tumbles down to my waits in casual but beautiful waves. I look toward Izzy, and I thought I looked nice, Izzy was absolutely stunning. She has a red dress that goes down to mid thigh and spaghetti straps. She has her hair down and straightened. She has mascara, black eyeliner and bright red lipstick, like mine.

"We're going clubbing with Jace and Alec!" Izzy exclaims. I groan, why with them? Well Alec I'm fine with but Jace, no.

*line break*{

We walk down the stairs and Jace and Alec look at us, annoyed that we took so long. Izzy catches the look and shrugs, "Beauty takes time boys, as you can see, just look at dear Clarissa!" I glare at her and she giggles- giggles this girl is crazy. I don't know why I like her so much, we are like polar opposites. I survey the boys' outfits and conclude that Izzy has outdone herself with our outfits. A lot.

Alec is wearing a pair of jeans with holes in the knees and a dark grey t-shirt(it's Alec what do you expect?) Jace is wearing dark jeans and a navy blue t-shirt. He put no effort into his outfit, but still manages to look stunningly gorgeous, how does he do it? I realize I've been staring at him a bit to long when he says-

"I know I'm stunningly attractive, but could you stop staring? It's making me uncomfortable." I glare and clench my fists to hold myself back from going and slapping that arrogant smirk right off his face.

"Why does he have to come? I'm sure there will be plenty of asshats at the club already, we don't have to add to that number!" I whine at Izzy, and Jace looks at me with mock offense.

"Ouch sweetheart. But everyone knows that you want-" he starts but thankfully, Izzy interrupts him there.

"Ok kids, let's keep it pg." she says, looking at Jace accusingly while he looks annoyed. He mumbles and ok and we head to the new club Pandemonium.

*line break*

The bouncer ushers us in after barely glancing at our ID's. "Well I guess that was easy." Izzy says. I nod in agreement, I haven't been to many clubs but they always seem to interrogate you before they let you in. I guess that's one of the reasons this one is so popular. We walk into the club and I am instantly overwhelmed by the swarm of bodies dancing to the music.

 **ok so this obviously isn't the best, but it'll get better blah blah blah, what I said in the first A/N and can someone PM or review and tell me where the line break button is? I can't find it, haha.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Sorry there are probably tons of spelling and grammar mistakes, but a.) Im too lazy to check it, haha sorry not sorry, and b.) I wanted to post it asap**.

 **I really should have put this in the AN yesterday but I will today. Hehe...**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own The Mortal Instruments or any of the characters, only the plot. All rights go to the amazing Cassandra Clare. (Though who wouldn't want to own Jace!?🔥)**

I look to my left and see a boy with dark hair and eyes.

"May I buy the beautiful lady a drink?" He asks seductively. And I giggle, I giggle I should stop hanging out with Izzy, or drinking. Probably the latter.

"Sure." I tell him and he waves at the bartender.

"2 more of whatever the lady's got." The bartender nods and begins to prepare our drinks.

"What's your name pretty lady?" He asks me, with a glint in his eyes.

"I am Clarissa Adele Fray." I slur "but you call me Clary."

"Well Clary, I am Sebastian, and I am going to take you on a date sometime." I giggle, again, what's with the giggling?

"Ok, dark prince" I say and the bartender slides us our drinks.

Sebastian gets off his seat and holds out his hand, "May I have this dance? He asks me with a playful glint in his eyes.

"Of course," I say and put my hand in his, "but be warned, I'm no good, and will probably smash your toes."

He chuckles and I look at him seriously "I'm serious. I'm horrible at dancing sober, I can't imagine this."

"Don't worry Clary, I'll teach you how to dance." He assures me and surprisingly, I don't do to bad. I look over to the side and see my friends watching me and I see Jaces eyes flash with, Jealously? No. Jace Herondale does not get jealous. I'm imagining it. Aren't I?

Jace POV

I watch her dance with Sebastard and feel jealousy ripple through me. No. It can't be jealousy, I don't get jealous, I can get a girl without batting an eye, I do not get feelings for girls. I can get any girl and have no need to get jealous. Or do I?

Izzy POV

I watch as Simon sits and sips his drink at the table. I wish he had the balls to get up and ask me to dance, this creep I'm dancing with is making me uncomfortable. I will him to get up and butt in and he stands, yes! He finally grew a pair!

He walks toward me and says " her Izzy I'm going to get another Drink, do you want anything?" I look at him angrily and be looks scared and confused dance with me! I try to tell him with my eyes, but he just stares at me like a doofus. I sigh and his hand and start dancing till he gets it and dances with me.

"What kind of boyfriend lets his girlfriend dance with a creep like that?" I ask him "Wait. What kind of boyfriend lets his girlfriend dance with any other guy?" I ask, exasperated.

"Well, he looks like he would've beat me up if I didn't listen to him," he scoffs "not that he could've beat me up I just didn't want to hurt him. Yea. That's what happened." I snort.

"Yea Simon. Sure." I look over to and see Jace looking lonely staring at the dance floor so I decide to go keep him company.

I grab Simons wrist and pull him over to Jace and we start talking about the odds that Simon has to beat up the creep I was dancing with. We agree that the odds are NOT in his favor. We are talking about going out to eat tomorrow when suddenly Jace stiffens.

"What's wrong?" I ask him, concerned and alert, because Jace doesn't get scared or nervous often. I follow his gaze and see clary dancing with a cute dark haired boy and I laugh.

"Jacey-poo has a crush on our dear Clary!" I tell Simon and he scoffs.

"The great Jace Herondale. Feelings? No! It can't be!" He says sarcastically and Jace glares at us.

"Shut up." He tells us and we laugh even harder.

Jace walks away, and up to the bar and grabs someone's abandoned drink and drinks it. Then he grabs the one next to it and drinks it. I roll my eyes. He can't even handle a little teasing.

Jace POV

I drink the drinks sitting on the counter because it looks like no one else is going to drink them so I might as well. I wish it was something stronger, alcohol doesn't effect me like it does other people. I sit there and sulk when I feel a tap on my shoulder and see dazed but furious green eyes glaring at me.

"I think you owe me a couple drinks." She says, looking at me accusingly and I roll my eyes and stand up. She pokes a finger against my chest and says "I want my drinks." I look down at her finger against my chest and back at her face with an eyebrow raised.

"I think you've had enough to drink sweetheart. We're going home." I pick her up bridal style and she huffs.

"Fine. But you still owe me."

I walk up the stairs with Clary asleep in my arms. I walk into the guest room next to mine and lay clary on the bed then I go into my room and collapse on my bed, too tired to change.

*line break*

"Jace?" A panicked voice says.

"Jace?"

"Jace wake up?"

I bolt upright and almost knock heads with Clary.

"Why are you in my room?" I ask her angrily and she looks at me curiously.

"You were screaming in your sleep and I wanted to make sure you were ok." She says innocently. My anger immediately dissipates and I remind myself To love is to destroy.

"Oh." Is all that I say. "Well I'm fine and it's not your problem so get out." I tell her and I watch as hurt flashed across her beautiful face. She looks down and rushes out of my room. I feel a twinge of guilt but I choose to ignore it and go to sleep.

Clary POV

I feel a pounding in my head and groan. I roll over and open my eyes and feel a pain shoot through my head.

"Hangovers a bitch, huh?" Someone says and I jump and look towards the voice and see Jace smirking, and holding what I'm assuming is Advil and a glass of water. I gratefully take it and thank him. I lay back down to go to sleep and feel the bed lurch as Jace sits down. I look at him quizzically.

"I'm sorry that I was rude last night." He says to me. I look into his eyes, this has to be a joke, right? I see my reflection in his eyes as he searches my face for any sign revealing whether or not I would apologize. He looks genuinely sorry and I am quick to forgive him.

He gets up and says "Great, now, don't ever speak of this again, ok sweatheart?" Now there is the arrogant sarcastic Jace we all know, I was beginning to get kind of creeped out with him being nice and all.

I grab my phone and see a text from an unknown number.

Hey pretty lady ;) it's Sebastian. I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date tonight with yours truly.

Hey Sebastian! I'd be happy to go on a date with you ;)

Alright Clary, I'll pick you up at 7.

See you then, Sebastian.

I smile, my first date! I lock my phone and set it on my dresser. I may or may not have done a little happy dance. I get dressed in jeans and an old band Tshirt and put my hair in a messy bun. I can't stop smiling, I haven't been this happy in a long time. I walk into the kitchen and see Jace sitting at the table with a cup of coffe and Alec making breakfast. Jace gives me a cup of coffee.

"I didn't know how you take your coffee so you can put sugar and whatever in it if you want." He says and I grin and lick my lips.

"Black," I say "like my soul." Jace chuckles.

"You got that right" he mumbles and I glare at him and take a drink of my coffee.

He chuckles, "You know, it's hard to look scary when your tiny and drinking coffee."

I open my mouth to retort when Izzy decides to walk in. "Please say our making bacon!" She whines to Alec and he nods at her with an amused expression. She closes her eyes and says "oh thank god" under her breath.

I laugh at how relieved she looks to have her precious bacon.

*line break*

"Izzy!" I yell "fashion emergency!" I know I am probably going to regret this so much but I need help I know NOTHING. About fashion. Nothing. 5 seconds later Izzy rushes in with tons of dresses and boxes full of makeup. Wow that girl is fast, I hate to say but, I'm impressed. 20 minutes later I'm in a green just above knee length dress with sleeves almost down to my elbows. There is a spot on the shoulder that is cut out that gives it a cool effect. It makes my eyes an even lighter shade of green and makes my hair look brighter red. Izzy kept the makeup light- for once. I had a light coat of mascara and brown eyeliner and pale pink lipstick. My hair went down to my waist in controlled, yet wild curls.

"I'm ready."

*line break*

"Tell me everything, don't leave out a single detail." Izzy tells me and I roll my eyes playfully.

"If you insist." I tell her.

**flashback

Sebastian pulls up and gets out as I'm walking up to his car and I look at him with both eyebrows raised. Yes both, I would've raised one eyebrow, but I can't. I don't understand how you raise just one! Other people-like Jace, can raise one but it's like mine are connected, where one goes the other follows.

He opens the door for me and I laugh, he is just being a gentleman. He looks over my outfit with an intense gaze-that makes me feel as if he is undressing me with his eyes. I fidget under his gaze and he snaps out of his "trance" and ushers me into the car. He walks back to the other side of the car and gets in.

Sebastian is dressed in dark jeans and a nice black button down shirt. He starts the car and starts to drive to who knows where.

"So, what are we doing tonight?" I ask him, curious. He looks over at me with a playful look in his eyes.

"You'll figure that out when we get there, darling." He says looking amused as I huff.

"I hate surprises." I tell him and he chuckles.

Trust me, you'll love this one." He assures me and I look out the window. The sun is starting to set and gives everything a golden glow. It's a beautiful night, perfect for a date.

When we arrive I see we are at a fancy restaurant and I am glad that I let Izzy dress me, surprising right? We go in and there is a waiter that leads us to our seats. The place has black chairs and tables with creamy white tablecloths. It looks beautiful, there are lights strung along what seems like ever available surface and I wish I had my sketchbook. We sit down and the waiter hands us each a glass of wine, and we set them on the table. Sebastian picks up the menu and o follow suit. There are so many options, I wonder if they have pancakes, or waffles.

"This is my favorite restaurant. Except when I don't get a reservation, the service is just awful." Sebastian tells me and I nod.

"I don't think I've ever been here. I don't go out to eat much." I reply and he looks surprised.

"You have to try the steak, it is amazing." He tells me, " I will order for you, since you've never been here." He states. I'm not sure that's how it works, but whatever.

The waiter comes back and asks for our orders. Sebastian orders steak and a baked potato for each of us, the waiter leaves and Sebastian looks at me.

"So," he starts, "Tell me about yourself. Family? Hobbies? Interests?" He asks me and I smile shyly.

"Well, I love to draw, paint, anything artistic. I guess I like to read and listen to music too... I have my Mom and my

Father figure Luke, and my awesome brother Jon. And I guess that's it, what about you?" I tell him.

"I like martial arts and karate. My parents died so I live with my aunt and cousins. Do you know Aline Penhallow?" I nod, she was in my class at school. "She's one of my cousins. And- Oh, here comes our meal."

*line break*

"I had fun Sebastian." I tell him, smiling.

"Me too, we should do this again sometimes." I nod, agreeing.

"Goodnight Clary." He whispers

"Goodnight Sebastian." I whisper back, not wanting to break the moment.

"Can I kiss you?" Sebastian whispers leaning forward slightly as I nod.

There are centimeters between our lips and I can feel his breath fanning across my face. He closes the distance between us and presses his lips to mine. The kiss is soft and sweet, just like how I always imaginedmy first kiss. As Sebastian leaves, no one notices the golden eyes watching in the darkness.

 **Hey guys, sorry about the Sebastian thing, I don't like him but he does incorporate into the story. The next chapter will probably be up in the next 1-2 days, because I have no life. Haha**

 **-HaileyHerondale1**


	3. Chapter 2

Hey guys, it's a little later then I expected But I've been busy this weekend. It's actually my brothers birthday and I just finished this last minute... Well enjoy!

Disclaimer:I do not own The Mortal Instruments or any of the characters. Just the plot. All rights go to the queen Cassandra Clare. I wish I was her...

Chapter 2

Jace POV

I can't believe she kissed him. That should've been me. Why would she go for a guy like him, he's an asshole! Why not someone like me, I'm so much better then Sebastian. Izzy says she has a brother, I wonder if he would approve of his baby sister having a boyfriend-

"Jace?" A voice cut through my thoughts, "what the hell are you doing?" Clary asks, enraged. As I look at her face I realize I was still staring out the window with clenched fists when she saw me. She must think I was watching her, not that I wasn't. I need an excuse...

"Nothing! I was just walking by and saw you coming inside and decided to wait for you." That sound valid enough, right? And it's not a lie, I just saw her a little before when I said I did. She raises both eyebrows.

"Right. And why do you look so angry?" She accuses. Excuse I need another excuse.

"Because my girlfriend-ex-girlfriend, was bragging about being my girlfriend. That was 2 years ago. She hasn't gotten over my beauty yet." Clary scoffs, she really must hate me.

"Whatever. Tell Izzy I went home." She says and I feel disappointment flow through me. I guess I will only see her when she comes over to see Izzy, not that I care.

"Whatever. It's not like anyone cares if you leave." She flinches and looks at me with a fire in her eyes.

"Yea? At least I care about people. I may not be a self centered, arrogant bastard like you, but at least I have feelings." She storms out and I gape. Ouch.

Clary POV

Why does he have to be like that! If he wasn't self centered, arrogant, sarcastic, or rude, I might actually like him! I storm into my house and run into my brother Jon.

"Woah little sister, what's gotten into you?" Jon asks me with wide eyes.

"Selfish, rude, and arrogant that's who." I tell Jon with a glare.

"It's fine Clare, I'll kick his ass for you!" I roll my eyes.

"You don't even know who "he" is!" I yell, exasperated. Jon looks at me accusingly

"So it is a he!" He yells triumphantly and I roll my eyes. "Did "he" break your heart? Clary I told you you couldn't date till you were 30, only 9 more years! Why did you have to disobey now!" Jon asks me.

"HE WASN'T MY FREAKING BOYFRIEND!" I yell and storm upstairs. I grab my sketchbook and a pencil. I climb out my window and onto the roof. The roof is where I go if I'm angry or sad. I like to sit up here at night and draw the city. I start to sketch the moonlit city. I am drawing the houses on the same street as ours when I notice Jon has incorporated himself into the drawing. He is standing on the sidewalk, looking at me with an eyebrow raised. I smile sheepishly and finish up my sketch then climb down.

"Sorry I got so mad Jon, Jace just frustrates me." I tell him and he looks at me quizzically.

"Jace Herondale?" He asks me and I nod.

"Stay away from him Clare-Bear. He's a player and will use you." I nod.

"I figured from the arrogant selfish attitude." I huff.

Jon pulls me towards him by my upper arms and kisses my forehead. "Get

Some sleep baby sister." He tells me and I crawl into bed.

As he leaves I yell out "by the way, Jon. I have a boyfriend!" Jon rushes into my room

"Screw sleep, WHAT!?" He tells and I laugh.

"Sebastian Verlac." I tell him and he nods.

"I approve." I gape at him.

"Really?" I ask, bewildered. Usually if I even mention a boy he tells me no. Even if it's something as innocent as a school project.

"Definitely. He's a good guy. He was one of my best friends in high school." I beam and he chuckles.

"Now, go to sleep!" He tells me, and I do.

I text Sebastian and ask why he never told me he knew Jon. Then Jon comes in.

"I'm throwing a party this weekend." I shake my head.

"No definitely not. Mom would kill you." I tell him.

"Mom already texted, she has another art convention this weekend." Of course...

I look at him uncertainly until he says-

"Your boyfriend can come. And you can invite some of your friends." I think for a second then nod.

"As long as I can invite whoever I want." I tell him and he nods then he leaves, to do whatever it is guys do in their free time. I brush my teeth and try to tame my unruly curls. I get dressed in skinny jeans and a paint splattered shirt. I go downstairs and make myself some coffee. I sip my coffee as I heat up some left over pancakes. My phone buzzes, signaling that I have a text, so I grab it out of my pocket and look at the screen. It says:

Sebastian(1)

Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to go out again today? I know it's short notice, but if your available, I'll pick you up in an hour.

I unlock my phone and happily reply:

Yea, I don't think I have anything going on today, so see you in an hour!

I put my phone back in my pocket, not bothering to wait for a reply. 10 minutes later, when I'm done with my pancakes, Jon walks in looking tired.

"Hey Jon!" I greet him cheerfully. He gives me a weird look.

"Hi...?" He says uncertainly and I laugh at him, "Why are you so happy this... Fine" (note the sarcasm) "morning?" I laugh.

"Oh nothing... Shit! I have to get ready for my date with Seb!" Jon looks at me knowingly.

"Oooh Clary's got it bad!" Jon teases and I blush.

"Shut up." I tell him and head upstairs.

*line break

The doorbell rings and I go downstairs. It's 11 am on the dot. I am wearing an emerald green bikini with a white and blue coverup dress. Seb told me we are going to the beach and to wear a swimsuit. I've never been to the beach. Well I guess I have but I don't really remember it. It was years ago, when mom and Luke were home all the time and not always at an art convention. They didn't tell me or Jon where we were going so we were antsy and restless the whole time. We had a great time from what I remember though.

*line break*

I splash Sebastian, then laugh at his betrayed expression.

He looks at me seriously "Clarissa Adele Fray." He scolds " You are definitely going to regret that." He lunges at me and grabs me by the waist. He swings me up into his shoulder and I laugh. I hit his back playfully.

"Put me down!" I screech.

"Alright." He says mischievously and throws me into the water. I barely have time to scream, then I'm underwater. I come up and look around for Sebastian.

"Seb?" I call out. I look at the beach and don't see him. He-

"Boo!" I scream and turn around o see Sebastian smiling in victory. I glare at him and he laughs.

"Better luck next time Princess..." He says and I roll my eyes and follow him out of the water.

Sorry it's so short! I tried... Next chapter will be extra long and something actually interesting will happen for the first time in this story...

-HaileyHerondale1


	4. Chapter 3

**Hey guys, so sorry for the long wait! It actually wasn't as long as I hoped, but the next chapter will make up for it, I promise. I hope you enjoy, now go on faithful readers!**

 **Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING. ALL RIGHTS TO CASSY.**

3 weeks later

"Bye Seb!" I say, laughing as he watches Jace and Jon playing a video game through the window of my house.

"I think that's the game I wanted..." He mumbles to himself. I open the door and hop out of his car.

"bye Seb!" I repeat and he looks over at me and laughs, like he is shocked to see me there. He jumps out of the car and walks over to me. He eyes the window where he can see Jon and Jace and then leans in and kisses me. Apparently too long for my big brother Jon's liking. I hear a window slide open and I jerk my head around and see Jon and Jace leaning out of it. Jon looking like he is trying to decide whether to be furious or disgusted. Jace just looks at up with his signature smirk, but it seems like there is something else in his golden eyes besides the usual amused and arrogant look. I shrug it off and look back at Seb.

"Bye!" I say and he smiles at me.

"Bye babe." He says warmly and I turn and walk into the house just to be greeted by a furious looking Jon.

"Clarissa! What the hell was that?!" He asks, enraged and I smile sheepishly at him.

"Umm... A kiss?" I say uncertain if he wants the real answer. Apparently not.

"I will not permit my baby sister to be kissed! Even by Sebastian! Not until you're at least 30! I can't believe that you would subject me to seeing such horrid things!" I laugh at my dear brother.

"Grow up Jonny-poo!" I say teasingly and resist the urge to laugh at his look of hurt at the nickname he hates so much. I look at him with the most seriousness I could muster.

"I've seen you do much worse, Jonny. Therefore it's only fair that I get to run the details in your face." He looks at me, horrified and runs out of the room yelling for Jace.

"JACE! JACE SAVE ME!" He screeches and I nod laughing.

"Yes, Jace!" I yell, "Save your damsel in distress! 'She' needs you!" I laugh and Jace comes running in carrying a terrified looking Jon covering his ears. Then I laugh even harder seeing how Jace is carrying Jon, bridal style. And he is carrying him effortlessly. I do hate him, but even I have to admit, his muscles are like, wow.

I am broken from my thoughts by Jon, "is it over?" He asks Jace, looking up at him like a victim wood look at a hero. Which, in his case, was probably what it was like.

"Yes, my darling, it's over. Your safe now." Jace says in a girly voice. Looking at Jon with amusement dancing in his golden eyes. Jon's expression hardens a little and he glares at Jace.

" .Down." Jon says, "I am not your girlfriend." Jace gasps.

"How quickly you dismiss our love!" He exclaims, mock hurt laced across his expression. Jon elbows him in the ribs and Jace rolls his eyes and drops Jon.

"Now," Jon says glaring at Jace and I, " if you do not mind, I would like to get back to Call of Duty." He stalks out of the room and back to his game and I have the most startling realization. Me and Jace were getting along. I scold myself internally. Don't get close to him at all. He is an arrogant-

"Clary?" I shake my head to clear it of my thought and look in front of me and see Jace. Standing way too close. I take a step back and look at him questioningly.

"What?" I ask him, annoyed, but then again not really.

"That's the third time I said your name. Did you space out?" He asks me. I swear that I saw concern flash across his face but he quickly covered it with his arrogant smirk and amused expression. I blush and he catches my blush before I can force it away.

He gasps "Clary! Thinking about me like that when you have a boyfriend!" I gape at him, " I mean, I know I'm the most gorgeous," sadly yep. "Sexy," mhm "beautiful man you have ever seen. But Clary, I wonder what dear Jonathan would say if he knew about your perverted thoughts." I glare at him.

"Stupid, arrogant, conceited, selfish-" I start, hating how he knew just the way to get under my skin.

"Jace get in here!" Jon yells and Jace smiles innocently and leaves and I glare at the back of his head as he walks away.

*Line break*

"Sorry Iz," I say, holding the phone to my ear with my shoulder and head. "I just don't know if I can go clubbing with you tonight, I don't have a ride..." Clubbing does sound fun right now...

"Jon can give you a ride." She tells me and I nod, a slight smile on my face, then I remember she can't see me.

"Alright Iz, I'll see you later." She hangs up and I throw my phone on my bed and walk into Jon's room.

"We're going to the club tonight!" I tell him and he looks at me with an expression that says 'no'. And that's exactly what he says. I give him my best puppy dog eyes, hoping to convince him to say yes. He groans, looking at me.

"Clare," he says, "you know that there is no way in hell you can convince me to do what you want, with puppy dog eyes." Oh so he wants to play it that way.

I let my lower lip wobble and I will my eyes to fill with tears. I see his restraint breaking with each passing moment till he breaks eye contact and sighs.

"Fine. What time?" He says and I smile, all traces of tears or anything gone.

"7" I tell Jon and he nods.

"Now go get ready. It takes girls forever to get ready!" He says and I look at him.

"Jon, it's 5:30. I don't need an hour and a half to get ready!" And I leave, doing as he asks, even though I know it will only take me, like, a half hour.

*line break*

As it turns out, Jon was right. An hour and a half after I left his room, I am just finishing my makeup as he bangs on my door.

"C'mon Clare! I didn't even want to go clubbing! You did, and your not even on time." I finish my cat eye and look over my appearance, satisfied. I walk to the door and swing it open just as Jon is about to knock again. He scans my outfit, as if to asses if he thinks anything should be deemed inappropriate. I roll my eyes as he nods and we walk out and get into the car.

"I told you that girls take forever." I begin to retort but I hold back, knowing that it's true. After an hour and a half, I managed to make myself look presentable enough. I was wearing a black dress that Izzy gave me to wear. It goes down to about mid thigh and it hugs my body and makes me look, dare I say it, hot. I had some black 4inch heels, which Izzy would never wear with her nothing below 7 inches rule. That girl is crazy. I managed to tame my unruly curls and now my hair flows down my back in wild, but tamed curls. I put on a little bit of mascara and used eyeliner and made a cat eye. I think I look pretty good, but I'm probably nothing compared to Izzy.

I am lost in thought when Jon nudges me and says that were here and I nod and get out of the car. Jon and I walk in and see Izzy right away. She is dancing with Simon and almost every guy is staring right at her. The second thing I notice is Jace and Alec talking over by the bar and I groan. Izzy didn't say anything about him coming. Jon and I walk up to the bar and I order a few shots of vodka for the two of us.

*line break*

2 hours later I'm feeling buzzed as I dance with Simon and Izzy. It feels great to dance with my two best friends.

"I love you guys." I say honestly, as I realize I haven't ever said that to them. Well I probably said it to Simon in the past. At one point he was actually in love with me, and he kissed me but I was disgusted and told him it was like kissing my brother or father. Yea, he didn't talk to me for 2 weeks, but then he got over it.

"Love you too Clare" they say at the same time. They look at eachother and grin and I feel like I'm intruding on a moment.

" I think I'm going to go find Jon and leave guys." I tell them. And they subconsciously nod and go back to dancing. I walk over to Jon, who is talking to Jace at the bar. I walk up to it and poke Jon.

"Jon. I wanna go home! Let's go." I tell him and pull him away as he chuckles.

"Ok Clare-bear, let's go." He says "bye

Jace!" He adds as an afterthought as he lets me lead him out of the club and to the passenger seat of his car. He starts the car as I walk around to the passenger side and get in. I buckle my seatbelt(I'm not that drunk... Or stupid) and lean back in the seat and watch the road ahead as we drive. I don't know why I've just always loved watching the road disappear as the car drove over it. Jon drives the car around the corner and keeps driving. I watch the road once again and I think-

"JON WATCH OUT!" I screech, seeing the car coming right for us. He swerves to miss the car but the front of it still hits the drivers side and I cry out as Jon whips forward. My head hits the door as the car rolls down the ditch. My vision is spotty as my seatbelt snaps and I whip forward, my ribs hitting the dashboard. I see a tree ahead of where we are rolling and look to the side just enough to see Jon's head hanging at a weird angle. I feel a scream crawl it's way up my throat but nothing comes out. I can't breathe. I can't think. I feel so tired. I close my eyes and subject to the darkness threatening to consume me.

3 weeks later

"Bye Seb!" I say, laughing as he watches Jace and Jon playing a video game through the window of my house.

"I think that's the game I wanted..." He mumbles to himself. I open the door and hop out of his car.

"bye Seb!" I repeat and he looks over at me and laughs, like he is shocked to see me there. He jumps out of the car and walks over to me. He eyes the window where he can see Jon and Jace and then leans in and kisses me. Apparently too long for my big brother Jon's liking. I hear a window slide open and I jerk my head around and see Jon and Jace leaning out of it. Jon looking like he is trying to decide whether to be furious or disgusted. Jace just looks at up with his signature smirk, but it seems like there is something else in his golden eyes besides the usual amused and arrogant look. I shrug it off and look back at Seb.

"Bye!" I say and he smiles at me.

"Bye babe." He says warmly and I turn and walk into the house just to be greeted by a furious looking Jon.

"Clarissa! What the hell was that?!" He asks, enraged and I smile sheepishly at him.

"Umm... A kiss?" I say uncertain if he wants the real answer. Apparently not.

"I will not permit my baby sister to be kissed! Even by Sebastian! Not until you're at least 30! I can't believe that you would subject me to seeing such horrid things!" I laugh at my dear brother.

"Grow up Jonny-poo!" I say teasingly and resist the urge to laugh at his look of hurt at the nickname he hates so much. I look at him with the most seriousness I could muster.

"I've seen you do much worse, Jonny. Therefore it's only fair that I get to run the details in your face." He looks at me, horrified and runs out of the room yelling for Jace.

"JACE! JACE SAVE ME!" He screeches and I nod laughing.

"Yes, Jace!" I yell, "Save your damsel in distress! 'She' needs you!" I laugh and Jace comes running in carrying a terrified looking Jon covering his ears. Then I laugh even harder seeing how Jace is carrying Jon, bridal style. And he is carrying him effortlessly. I do hate him, but even I have to admit, his muscles are like, wow.

I am broken from my thoughts by Jon, "is it over?" He asks Jace, looking up at him like a victim wood look at a hero. Which, in his case, was probably what it was like.

"Yes, my darling, it's over. Your safe now." Jace says in a girly voice. Looking at Jon with amusement dancing in his golden eyes. Jon's expression hardens a little and he glares at Jace.

" .Down." Jon says, "I am not your girlfriend." Jace gasps.

"How quickly you dismiss our love!" He exclaims, mock hurt laced across his expression. Jon elbows him in the ribs and Jace rolls his eyes and drops Jon.

"Now," Jon says glaring at Jace and I, " if you do not mind, I would like to get back to Call of Duty." He stalks out of the room and back to his game and I have the most startling realization. Me and Jace were getting along. I scold myself internally. Don't get close to him at all. He is an arrogant-

"Clary?" I shake my head to clear it of my thought and look in front of me and see Jace. Standing way too close. I take a step back and look at him questioningly.

"What?" I ask him, annoyed, but then again not really.

"That's the third time I said your name. Did you space out?" He asks me. I swear that I saw concern flash across his face but he quickly covered it with his arrogant smirk and amused expression. I blush and he catches my blush before I can force it away.

He gasps "Clary! Thinking about me like that when you have a boyfriend!" I gape at him, " I mean, I know I'm the most gorgeous," sadly yep. "Sexy," mhm "beautiful man you have ever seen. But Clary, I wonder what dear Jonathan would say if he knew about your perverted thoughts." I glare at him.

"Stupid, arrogant, conceited, selfish-" I start, hating how he knew just the way to get under my skin.

"Jace get in here!" Jon yells and Jace smiles innocently and leaves and I glare at the back of his head as he walks away.

*Line break*

"Sorry Iz," I say, holding the phone to my ear with my shoulder and head. "I just don't know if I can go clubbing with you tonight, I don't have a ride..." Clubbing does sound fun right now...

"Jon can give you a ride." She tells me and I nod, a slight smile on my face, then I remember she can't see me.

"Alright Iz, I'll see you later." She hangs up and I throw my phone on my bed and walk into Jon's room.

"We're going to the club tonight!" I tell him and he looks at me with an expression that says 'no'. And that's exactly what he says. I give him my best puppy dog eyes, hoping to convince him to say yes. He groans, looking at me.

"Clare," he says, "you know that there is no way in hell you can convince me to do what you want, with puppy dog eyes." Oh so he wants to play it that way.

I let my lower lip wobble and I will my eyes to fill with tears. I see his restraint breaking with each passing moment till he breaks eye contact and sighs.

"Fine. What time?" He says and I smile, all traces of tears or anything gone.

"7" I tell Jon and he nods.

"Now go get ready. It takes girls forever to get ready!" He says and I look at him.

"Jon, it's 5:30. I don't need an hour and a half to get ready!" And I leave, doing as he asks, even though I know it will only take me, like, a half hour.

*line break*

As it turns out, Jon was right. An hour and a half after I left his room, I am just finishing my makeup as he bangs on my door.

"C'mon Clare! I didn't even want to go clubbing! You did, and your not even on time." I finish my cat eye and look over my appearance, satisfied. I walk to the door and swing it open just as Jon is about to knock again. He scans my outfit, as if to asses if he thinks anything should be deemed inappropriate. I roll my eyes as he nods and we walk out and get into the car.

"I told you that girls take forever." I begin to retort but I hold back, knowing that it's true. After an hour and a half, I managed to make myself look presentable enough. I was wearing a black dress that Izzy gave me to wear. It goes down to about mid thigh and it hugs my body and makes me look, dare I say it, hot. I had some black 4inch heels, which Izzy would never wear with her nothing below 7 inches rule. That girl is crazy. I managed to tame my unruly curls and now my hair flows down my back in wild, but tamed curls. I put on a little bit of mascara and used eyeliner and made a cat eye. I think I look pretty good, but I'm probably nothing compared to Izzy.

I am lost in thought when Jon nudges me and says that were here and I nod and get out of the car. Jon and I walk in and see Izzy right away. She is dancing with Simon and almost every guy is staring right at her. The second thing I notice is Jace and Alec talking over by the bar and I groan. Izzy didn't say anything about him coming. Jon and I walk up to the bar and I order a few shots of vodka for the two of us.

*line break*

2 hours later I'm feeling buzzed as I dance with Simon and Izzy. It feels great to dance with my two best friends.

"I love you guys." I say honestly, as I realize I haven't ever said that to them. Well I probably said it to Simon in the past. At one point he was actually in love with me, and he kissed me but I was disgusted and told him it was like kissing my brother or father. Yea, he didn't talk to me for 2 weeks, but then he got over it.

"Love you too Clare" they say at the same time. They look at eachother and grin and I feel like I'm intruding on a moment.

" I think I'm going to go find Jon and leave guys." I tell them. And they subconsciously nod and go back to dancing. I walk over to Jon, who is talking to Jace at the bar. I walk up to it and poke Jon.

"Jon. I wanna go home! Let's go." I tell him and pull him away as he chuckles.

"Ok Clare-bear, let's go." He says "bye

Jace!" He adds as an afterthought as he lets me lead him out of the club and to the passenger seat of his car. He starts the car as I walk around to the passenger side and get in. I buckle my seatbelt(I'm not that drunk... Or stupid) and lean back in the seat and watch the road ahead as we drive. I don't know why I've just always loved watching the road disappear as the car drove over it. Jon drives the car around the corner and keeps driving. I watch the road once again and I think-

"JON WATCH OUT!" I screech, seeing the car coming right for us. He swerves to miss the car but the front of it still hits the drivers side and I cry out as Jon whips forward. My head hits the door as the car rolls down the ditch. My vision is spotty as my seatbelt snaps and I whip forward, my ribs hitting the dashboard. I see a tree ahead of where we are rolling and look to the side just enough to see Jon's head hanging at a weird angle. I feel a scream crawl it's way up my throat but nothing comes out. I can't breathe. I can't think. I feel so tired. I close my eyes and subject to the darknes threatening to consume me.

 **I hope it was interesting enough! I will update sometime within the next week or two, hopefully so** **oner. I have a sparkley surprise for you all next chapter! I bet you can't guess what(or who;) it is... :)**

 **-HaileyHerondale1**


	5. Chapter 4

Sorry about the cliffie last chapter! Anyway onwards faithful readers!

Disclaimer: I own NOTHING

Jace POV

As I dance with a pretty brunette I feel as if something is off. I look around the club and see clary leaving with Jon and I sigh and walk over to Izzy and Alec. They are both glaring at a guy with dark hair and weird pointy ears. He looks like an elf.

"I don't care Meliorn, I broke up with you 2 years ago. Get over it!" Izzy exclaims and I look at Meliorn with an eyebrow raised.

"Do I need to teach him a lesson?" I ask Izzy, while looking at Meliorn. He looks easy enough to beat. He sizes me up and then his shoulders sag and he walks away as Izzy and I laugh at him.

We sit and talk for about 10 minutes until Izzy pulls out her phone. She dials something and puts the phone up to her ear. A few seconds later she pulls it away from her and looks at her phone with a puzzled expression. She tries again a few times before looking at me.

"Go find her." She demands and I gape at her.

"You can't tell me what to do!" I say and she glares at me, "Anyway, who am I supposed to find?"

She looks at me like I'm stupid and says "Clary! Duh! Earlier she said she would call when she got home but she hasn't called, so find my best friend." She demands "please?" She asks and I stand up. She must be really worried, she never says please. She must be really worried about her is the strongest girl I know and looking into her tear-filled eyes I know that I have to go find Clary.

I nod and turn around. I walk to the exit and walk out to my car. I get in and start on the drive to Jon's house. I decide to go the way that most people don't go, just because it's bust in the city tonight. As I'm driving I realize that something really might've happened to Jon and Clary. But the chances of something bad are quite slim and I'm confident that they are fine. I turn the corner and am blinded by headlights pointed at me and I slam the brake. I see a car down in the ditch and I swear my heart stops. I can't identify the car with the headlight staring me in the face but I have a horrid feeling I know who it is. I open the door to my car and run towards the car. I see one of the back windows is smashed in and I climb up so I can reach in to unlock and open the door. The car is on its side and I fall into it as I pull my phone out and call 911. I see Jon with his head bent at an odd angle and blood trickling out of his mouth. He has a cut on his forehead and his leg looks odd. I look over at Clary and I see that she looks so much worse. Her hair, once vibrant and beautiful, is coated in a dark color. Blood. So much blood. There is blood flowing steadily from a wound where her ribs are. Blood is coming from her head, and also her calf where there is a price of metal sticking into it.

"911, what is your emergency?"

*line break*

"I get that! Are they going to be ok!?" I yell at the scared looking nurse as she tells me they are both in critical condition.

"We don't know." She says softly and I sit down numbly. I hate hospitals, they remind me of my past. I feel nothing but numbness as I wait for what feels like days. As a solemn-looking doctor walks up to me. As I stand up expectantly I'm just waiting for him to tell me that they didn't make it.

"Is there any family that would need to hear what happened?" He asks and I shake my head then think about it and shrug.

"They are at work, and never home, but I'm not sure... You could call?" I suggest and he motions for a nurse to call the parents. Then looks at me solemnly once again.

"I'm not supposed to talk to you about this, since you aren't family, but I'll make an exception due to the fact that you've been waiting here for the last

8 hours. You seem to really care about your friends." He says and I nod as he takes a deep breath, preparing to deliver the news.

"I always hate this part." He mumbles before saying "We're so sorry, but son. Jonathan didn't make it." I gasp and feel the numbness coming back, but ten times worse that before.

"And Clary?" I ask, my voice hoarse.

"Clarissa is stable," He says and I release the breath I was holding. "but, she has sustained many major injuries. She has suffered a sever concussion, and she has a rather horrible injury a few inches below the knee. A metal rod went through her calf, thankfully it only hit the bone slightly so we had to perform surgery, but it wasn't as bad as it could've been. She also has many broken and fractured ribs, and she lost a lot of blood. We weren't sure if she would make it, but she pulled through. Your girl is very strong." He compliments and I nod, not bothering to tell him that she isn't 'my girl'.

"But we also believe that she may be in a coma." He tells me and I nod telling myself it could've been worse.

"Can I see her?" I ask him and he nods. Leading me to her room. I walk in and gasp at the sight of my Clary. She is even paler than usual and all of the tubes sticking out of her give me a strange urge to cry. And I don't cry. I look across the room and see a very sparkly man. He is Asian and has what I think is sparkles in his hair. He has eyeliner around his eyes and has sparkles all over his doctors suit.

"Hey sexy,"He says and I gape at him as he smirks at me. "You must be biscuits boyfriend." He says and I don't bother to correct him.

"Biscuit?" I ask and he nods his head at Clary.

"Biscuit." He clarifies and I nod as I sit next to her and take her hand. "Well, I must tend to my other patients. I'm Magnus by the way. Magnus Bane." As he walks out I stare at where he was, still in a bit of shock about how outgoing he is. I look back at clary and put my head down on the bed next to the hand I'm holding. Her hands are extremely cold and I fight the urge to blow on them to warm them. I sit next to her until I fall asleep.

*line break*

Someone shakes me as I sleep, waking me from my slumber. I sit up and what happened instantly comes back to me and I look down at Clary. I look back up at the person who was shaking me and I see a woman who looks like an older version of Clary. Except this woman's eyes are a couple shades darker and so is her hair. She has dark shadows under her eyes and looks extremely stressed.

"Are you her mother?" I ask her and she nods with tears in her eyes.

"I don't think she will want you in here" I say and she gapes at me.

"I am her mother! Of course she wants me here!" I look at her sadly when she says with tears in her eyes "One of my children is dead! Dead! And I want to be here to support the other one!"

"Jon told me how your never home. He said your always at an art convention or working late. He said that he basically raised Clary. He told me that you were never there for them for anything" I tell her and she starts to interrupt me, rage clear in her eyes, but I continue. "Yes, you gave them a house, and money, but no child should have no parent around, no matter what." Jocealynn nods with tears threatening to spill out of her eyes.

"I know, I do. And I know I've been a shitty mother to them." She said and I nod, agreeing. "But I want to be better. I really do." She tells me and I nod and leave, realizing that she might really want to see her daughter, and make things better.

*line break*

364 hours, 42 minutes, and 17 seconds since they confirmed Clary was in a coma. They were beginning to have doubts if she would wake up. I've hardly left her side, except for when people want to see her in private, or doctors usher me out. The nurses, Izzy, and Alec try to get me to eat but I can't choke much down. I only eat enough to stay functioning. I can't help but somehow feel responsible for what happened. Afterall it was my idea to go clubbing. Izzy and even Alec are devastated. We all got close to our little redhead before the... Accident.

"Please son," Robert Lightwood, my adoptive father says, "Go eat something, anything." He begs with me and I have to give in. Robert doesnt show emotion often, so I leave and go to get some food.

Clary POV

Darkness. Everything is dark. I sometimes hear voices, but I can't make out the words. But mostly, darkness and a strange constant steady beeping. When I can make out voices this is what they usually say:

"Please Clary, wake up. I need my friend back"

or

"Your a strong little girl to make it through all of this."

Except right now. Right now I can hear everything clearly. But all that I hear is someone telling someone to go eat and then the warmth on my hand dissapears. Sometimes through the darkness I feel weight on my chest and someone is always holding my hand. I hear a door close then someone sighs.

"I didn't know you till my kids got close to you, but I'm begging you, please wake up. Isabelle and Alec miss you, but Jace is broken without you." Jace? I think, he doesn't even like me! Then I hear the door close again and I am left with silence, accept the same beeping I've been hearing for so long.

"Hey Biscuit. How are you doing?" I hear someone say and try to open my eyes to see who the newcomer is. He must notice my movement and he gasps.

"Don't rush yourself to wake up biscuit." He says and I open my eyes to the most blinding light I've ever seen. I look around after my eyes adjust and I see a very sparkly man in front of me, grinning.

He gasps and looks at me excitedly, "I have to go get your friends! They will be so happy! Oh and by the way biscuit, your boyfriend has been sitting in here with you for the whole time you've been in here!" I look at him confused. Why am I even here?

"Why am I here?" I ask him and he looks at me and tells me that I got in an accident. I think really hard and I remember the flash of headlight in front of us and the cat hitting Jon's side and I gasp and it comes rushing back to me. I sob as I think of how Jon looked slumped over in his seat like that. It's all my fault anyway. I told him to go to the club, and now he's hurt.

"can I see my brother?" I ask the sparkly man and he looks at me sadly. And I know. I know what that look means.

"It's my fault. All my fault."

Poor clary... To be honest, I don't know how I feel about that Jocealynn/ Jace scene... Let me know what you think... And does anyone else ABSOLUTLEY despise auto correct sometimes? I mean seriously...

-HaileyHerondale1


	6. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Funeral. Such an ugly word. Starts with the word fun, and twists it into something ugly.

This is what I think as my mom picks out my outfit and ushers me into the shower. I stand in the shower as the scolding water flows over me and all I feel is numbness. The last 3 days all I've felt is numbness. I've been waiting for Jon to come into my room and yell at me to get up in his cheerful way. Or for him to call me to dinner.

It doesn't happen.

Everyday my mom brings my food to my room for me.

I don't eat it. I can't.

I can't do anything.

My mom looks in the bathroom and looks at me with a scrutinizing gaze. She looks tired, and like she's been crying.

I look worse.

She scans over my tangled red hair. Then my sad, hollow looking eyes. She looks over my skinny frame with a disapproving sigh and she looks at my eyes again. She decides that I'm not going to do anything so she grabs my arm and pulls me out of the shower. I slowly pull on my clothes, trying to make it last longer. If I go to the funeral, it will seem real.

I don't like real.

My mom grabs the black dress she picked for me and impatiently, but careful of my injuries, pulls it over my head. Her eyes fill with tears as she realized just how broken this has left me, physically and emotionally. I squeeze my eyes shut as tears spill down my mothers cheeks. She reaches out to me and pulls me into her and I grip her weakly.

I haven't cried.

There is just numbness.

*Line Break*

My mom and dad get me out of the car. My Mom stands on my left side, my Dad on the right. As we walk towards the church people give us pitying gazes and I squeeze my eyes shut.

I don't want pity, I want Jon.

Some people start to walk over to offer their condolences but dad ushers them away to comfort me.

It doesn't help.

*Jace POV*

I get out of the car with my parents. I don't want to be here, suffering the loss of my best friend alone. We didn't know each other long, but we got close, almost too close, fast. I see a flash of red out of the corner of my eye and look towards the vibrant color. I narrow my eyes to look at clary, and it seems as if she is taking this worse than the parents. Her hair is unkept, her usually happy green eyes lifeless and dull. She looks even skinnier then she did before the crash. And all those bandages and casts on her skinny frame look overpowering. She looks horrible. Like the shell of the Clary I love to tease. I think for once me and Clary can agree on something.

We want-we need Jon back.

*Clary POV*

The priest starts talking and I finally feel tears prickle my eyes. It's all seeming real now. But all I feel is numbness, a numbness like never before. It's slowly flowing through my body till I can't feel anything. I faintly hear what the priest is saying and I feel a single tear roll down my cheek. I can't let it all out now. I have to get out of here. The praise calls my name to speak a eulogy and I shake my head violently but my parents usher me up. I look around, at everyone. My family, classmates, and even some of Jon's teachers and professors. And I know that I can't do it. It seems as if the room is closing in on me, squeezing tighter and tighter, and I can't breathe. I run out of the church. I hit the ground and roll up into a ball and I start rocking back and forth, tears treating down my face like a dam broke and everything is coming through at once. I start shaking and feel a heaviness in my chest. My breath comes out in short, harsh pants and my heart races. I can't breathe. I can't do anything. The pain in my chest is like a weight pressing down and it's getting heavier and heavier. I am still numb. I am always numb. I'm going to die here. I'm going to die. I hear a door open and someone runs towards me. Jace.

"J-j-ja-ce." I manage to say and he nods.

"It's okay. Don't talk. I'm right here. You'll be okay. Your having a panic attack. It's okay." He whispers this to me as he grips my hands. "Focus on my face, okay?" He says and I try to nod. I look into his golden eyes and try to breath. "Steady breaths, control your breathing. In. Out. In. Out.-" he continues this for I don't know how long until I am leaning on him, taking deep breaths. I can't stop the shaking, and I can't go back into the church. Jace seems to understand this as he grabs my hand to help me up. I stand but my legs wobble and I topple forward. I brace myself for impact, but it never comes. Strong arms wrap around me and Jace picks me up, one arm on my back, the other under my knees. He carries me to his car and pulls out his phone and texts someone, then pulls out of the parking lot. I am still breathing heavy and the numbness won't go away, but I'm okay.

"How did you know?" I ask him. And he glances at me.

"Know what?" He asks and I look at him.

"What to do when I had the... Panic attack." I tell him and he looks at me knowingly.

"I have... Experience." He tells me and I gape at him.

"You've had a panic attack?" I ask him, bewildered and he nods.

"But that's a story for another time." He tells me and I look out the window and I realize something. He made me forget about Jon. Nothing has done that lately. Not even art. I tried to draw, sketch, paint. But nothing helps. I sigh, the numbness taking over me once again and I sink down in my seat, trying to get rid ofthe memories flashing back.

A bright light. A crash. Blood, So much blood. Screams, my screams. A snap-

"Clary! We're here." I look over at Jace as he looks at me with a concerned expression. I look up to see that we are at Jaces house.

"Bring me home." I say and he looks at me, as if unsure. "I said, bring me home. Now." He looks at me, studying me, until he finally nods and looks to the road as he pulls out.

*Line Break*

I get out of Jaces car and thank him for the ride and go into my room. Sure I had a few minutes of "happiness" but it didn't last. I lay down on my bed and squeeze my eyes shut as I sink into my cocoon of despair.

As I ly there I feel myself drifting off until I fall deep into sleep.

 _"Jon!" I yell, looking for my brother. We were playing hide &seek in the woods behind Luke's old farmhouse. The trees surround us as I continue walking. I see a flash of color and look up. I see a bird flying above my head. I continue to walk as I see animals move all around me. _

_A squirrel runs by my feet, startling me as I continue deeper into the trees. There are thorn bushes surrounding the path and I know Jon couldn't have gotten over those. I look up and as I do, I swear I hear my name whispered_

 _"Clary..." The whispered voice says again and I look around, frightened._

 _"Jon?" I call out, starting to worry. Usually I've found him by now. I walk down the path, looking left and right, and up in the trees. I hear a slight groan and hear rustling. I follow the sound, which is coming from down the path. I go down the path and hear another rustle, to the right of me. I turn toward the sound and gasp._

 _Jon is lying in the underbrush, his neck bent at an odd angle, his body mangled and torn, like some wild animal tore him up. His eyes are fluttering and his mouth seems to be forming unknown words. A sob is ripped out of my chest as I bend down next to him._

 _I can slightly hear the whispered mumbles, but I can hardly make them out. I hear the words "Clary...your...forgive..." The mumbles get louder as I listen to him._

 _"Clary, it's all your fault" he accuses and I sob harder "I will never forgive you. I am gone and it's all your fault. No one will ever forgive you. You made me bring you to that party, and you made me leave" I sob as he accuses me of these things. "It's your fault" he chants as the world swings and swirls. Everything is falling apart and I see my family and friends. They join in the chanting with Jon as I sob harder and harder._

 _"Clary." A voice says._

 _"Clary!" More frantic this time_

"Clary! Wake up!" I open my eyes and shoot up in bed, hitting heads with my mom. She winces as I lay back down.

"sorry, you were... Yelling in your sleep. Something about it being your fault?" She says and I nod. "Well, I brought you supper, if you... Want to eat." I nod, even though we both know that I'm not going to eat. My mom leaves the room and I sigh and lean back down.


End file.
